birds in a barrel's mission is to release creative nonfiction into the wild.

40 Days & 40 Writes is its first project.

Moving Dream

There’s no mystery to my anxiety dreams. They are generally related to a daytime issue I’m dealing with now. Right now, I’m dealing with coaxing the money owed to my HOA from other homeowners while at the same time negotiating with a contractor for the improvements we hope to make. So, the dreams are about all the things that make me deviate from my task. The other strange thing about my anxiety dreams is that they can sometimes be funny once I awake and remember them.

The ones I’m having now are not very funny. The anxiety dreams from some years ago I still remember. About 25 years ago I was traveling a lot and my children were very young and I always missed them when I was gone. One time I dreamed I had to fly to Switzerland for a very important meeting. I arrived and went to my hotel and had to change immediately into a suit for the meeting. I opened my suitcase and the only thing in there were children’s toys. I also moved myself to California with the help of a buddy of mine. I rented a 30-foot truck, loaded it up, which took 4 guys a whole day, and drove across the country, which took 5 days. The unloading was slightly easily but not by much. Although I was only 46 at the time this was back breaking work and I’ve never been so tired. For weeks after I had “moving” dreams and of course all of them were insane or disastrous. I dreamt that I offered my ex-wife to move her. She didn’t have to move. I simply offered to move everything out of her house and then back in. Weirdly, she agreed. Another time, I dreamt I was moving the entire contents of my home by the plane’s overhead compartment. Of course, it was impossible, and everyone was yelling at me as I struggled with items that didn’t have a prayer of fitting into the overhead.

These days I’m not having funny anxiety dreams; I’m having boring and annoying anxiety dreams.

Exposure

He Had Me at Goosebumps