birds in a barrel's mission is to release creative nonfiction into the wild.

40 Days & 40 Writes is its first project.

I'll Stay on my Team

I never thought about what the opposite gender until I was divorced with daughters two and three years old. The idea never registered. I grew up with "Father Knows Best" and "The Donna Reed Show" where women wore dresses and pearls when they were making dinner for their 2.4 children in the suburbs. I just assumed I'd marry, have kids, and be a housewife.


Hmmm. Didn't quite work out. Got divorced. Then the gender roles woke me up. I had to be the breadwinner, nurse, chauffer, chef, playmate, and financier of my now three-person family. I was overwhelmed. I became the "man/father" of the family as well as the mother. It made me stronger, eventually. It woke me up to so-called traditional roles of men and women. With all the struggles I went through: not enough money ever, being consistently tired physically and emotionally, I wouldn't change a thing. I had my women friends. Close friends. Some of them in the same boat as me. And we had each other. We cried and laughed together. We babysat each others kids. We shared our feelings. We had a sister-circle.

I don't believe most men have those kinds of relationships, heavy emphasis on "most." There may be a couple of men somewhere that do that kind of thing. Hope so.

All that to say, I like being a woman. I like the depth I believe we have. The soul of the planet runs through our veins.

Child, Girl/Boy, Woman

Pupil Personal